:~susana~:

Friendships

Tonight, once I finally settled at home, I reflected on this:

“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 17:17

I’ve had my season of long friendships that have lasted for almost a decade, if not more in some cases, but I’ve realized if when people (friends) see you and don’t really ask how you’re doing, then honestly that means they really don’t care. And I’ve noticed that with alot of people. I’m tired of making the extra effort-phone call, text, email, lunch and it not be given in return.

So it’s time for me to take a step back.

And this is it.

Grad School..

So I started this processs yesterday. As of right now these are the only two schools that peak my interest: DePaul University & Moody. But I’m still debating on what to study. My current job provides alot of experience if I want to do counseling. But ideally, I would love to study Media & Cinema or Urban Studies.

Mrs. Lopez

How weird does that sound? After being referred to Ms. Medina forthe past 22 years, dropping the Medina and adding the Lopez is a completely foreign idea to me. Some of you may have read my post a few weeks back on facebook when I was debating whether or not to hyphenate, add on or completely drop Medina or Lopez. Originally Aaron had agreed to allow for me to do either hyphenate or add on Lopez. But when I came back from the honeymoon, still having Medina-it just didn’t feel right (of course, the documents didn’t show it) but I had that feeling. So I thought and though and thought.

This was my thought process: i’m the only Medina woman on my fathers side out of about 10 or so (if not more) men and I have both of my grandmothers name. So Susana Aida Medina holds a lot of history, linage and meaning that I was really really proud of. So proud of that I wrote a poem and published it (and won money for it).

And this was the breaking point: as proud as I am of being a Medina, I made my family proud, particulary my father. I graduated college on a full-scholarship, remained a virgin until I got married, married a wonderful man, and got a full-time job after college.

Now, it’s Aaron’s turn to take on the pride because as Susana Aida Lopez, I will make him proud in every which way I can. No one will ever be able to take Medina away from me. I know who I am, where I come from and how strong my family and ancestors were. Now it’s my turn to learn about what “Lopez” encompasses: it’s history and lineage. Of course, it’ll take some time getting use to but through the years it’ll only get better.

As terrified as I am now of bearing and raising children, I know one day the season of motherhood will come and when it does come I will be filled with joy to teach our children what it means to be both Medina and Lopez, regardless if Medina isn’t visible on on my mail or called out-loud after my name.